Self Influence

Throughout all of my life there has never been a single person who has really influenced my life. I have sat through much of my life shunning away from society and doing my own thing without caring about what others thing. I have spent many years indoors away from other people just watching television and playing video games. I have sought only council from myself. Whenever anyone has tried to give me any sort of advice I have always shunned him or her away and ignored them.

To me people have always been an irritation. They spend too much time worrying about public image. I always hated the competition that people threw into everyday life. I allowed my self to stay separated from that. I allowed myself to be free of this rotting society. I found the quotes from video games and movies to have more meaning than anything some adult tried to tell me. Most of the things that I learned were even from video games. Everyone from my school became a drug addicted nobody while I kept myself sheltered from the outside.

Without any outside influence I managed to stay healthy. People always seem to be impressed by how stress free I am too. Without outside influence it is hard to think about what could possibly happen. When you do not have much to lose or gain from something you do not worry about consequences. My parents would always tell me that I should trust other people, but people would always let me down. They cared too much about themselves.

The worst part was how close-minded everyone was. When you stay away from society and do not let people force things like political parties and religion into your mind you can live a much happier life. It is much easier to appreciate the finer things in life when people are not forcing you to think the same way that they do. I don’t want to have people try to get me to eat fat free food because it’s “healthier”. I don’t want people to tell me to listen to certain music because it sounds “better”. Nothing makes angrier though than the people that are so close-minded that no matter how good something is they refuse to believe that it is any good at all just because it goes against the beliefs that their parents shoved down their throat as a child.

So many people have told me that it is wrong to ignore people because it is disrespectful. Too many people have told me that I should be nice to people because their god wants me to. I let myself be who I want to be. There are people in the world that completely shut out certain movies or shows because it isn’t the same as some other show. People have stopped progressing in the world because they can’t accept change. The human race wants everything to be the same. And nobody stands for something that shocks him or her. Why is it that when a movie ends with a twist suddenly people freak out and say the movie was terrible? Why is it that when someone does something unexpected they are suddenly laughed and mocked?

Everyone tries to rule over one another thinking that they can solve anything. People let themselves get fed crap like “one person can make a difference” and rely on it their entire lives. Well I’m different. I know the limitations of the world and I understand what is real and what is fantasy. I won’t let myself be influenced by someone that doesn’t understand me. I won’t let myself be influenced by someone that doesn’t understand themselves. Too many people tell me to pray. They tell me asking some greater being to change things will make it happen. No one ever tried to give me something real to hang on to. People just tell me to rely on other people. Other people are worthless. No one will try and fix my problems but me. I don’t need other people to believe in me. I don’t want to believe in someone else who believes in me. I want to believe in me that believes in myself. I want to live my own life the way I want to live it. I let myself believe what I want to believe.

How can I listen to other people anyway when they won’t listen to themselves? People constantly just string together words to make a point without even thinking. People will contradict themselves at all times and then get pissed off when someone points out their flaws. The human race is so self-conscious that instead of admitting fault they would rather put down the person that is proving them wrong than let anyone see the truth. They won’t even let themselves see the truth.

My teachers in elementary school were always saying we should have heroes, people to look up to. We were only ten years old. How are we supposed to know anyone that we could really follow? We were still stuck in a small town where people were telling us what to think and do. The only heroes we knew at the time were superman and batman. Would it have really been a good idea to try and be like some invincible man of steel that just let people treat him however they wanted? Should I have tried to be like a guy that spent his nights lurking around trying to fight criminals as an excuse to find people that are crazier than him? I have always been better off staying away from influences, and I always will be.

I don’t want to believe in someone else who believes in me. I want to believe in me that believes in myself.

How can I listen to other people anyway when they won’t listen to themselves? People constantly just string together words to make a point without even thinking. People will contradict themselves at all times and then get off when someone points out their flaws. The human race is so self-conscious that instead of admitting fault they would rather put down the person that is proving them wrong than let anyone see the truth. They won’t even let themselves see the truth.

I found the quotes from video games and movies to have more meaning than anything some adult tried to tell me.