The Catherbury Tales

The Catherbury Tales are a set of stories told be a group of travelers going from the Blue Moon Inn in Varrock to the Holy Bank at Catherbury. The people are very different and so are their stories.

The Characters Are:
The Level 3 Noob - Frogger
The 1337 Pker - Hiei The Pk
The Champion - Gamestar
The Hero - Whydidijoin
The Legend - Mustangnut
The Mage - Zilla
The Ancient - GCSE
The Ranger - Ranger Blue
The Dwarf - Monk Basher
The Elf - Trendyhaz
The Goblin - Henner
The White Knight - Jimmybe
The Chef - Tooooon
The Host - Dr Henry

Dr Henry kicked at the sides of his toy horsey, which stood up, and galloped off in front of the group. "Now everybody, to pass the time, I want everyone to tell a story, and the best story gets a keg from me!" He announced to the travelers.
"Now who should set us off? Ermm..." He paused, "How about you, Mr. Goblin?"
"Fine...," the Goblin grumbled, "but call me Henner!"

The Goblin's Tale
One day, the Galvatrun Tribe of Goblins, from the Lumbridge Swamps, were hungry. Their last morsel of food was eaten by a couple of Penguins disguised as a Sheep and the tribe had been too famished to chase it. The youngest member of the tribe was called Henner, and he was an outsider as everyone, even his family, shunned him for being born with a larger nose. He had hidden a stash of food and was the least hungry, so he grabbed a bronze spear and went off in search of food for his tribe to gain favour with his chief.
He bypassed the camp of travellers around their fire and walked around the fence, spotting a farm in the distance. He crawled along his stomach, not caring about dirt as he was already caked in layers of it. His green skin matched the surrounding grass so he was almost invisible to the human eye, although his stench was unbearable, especially to himself as he had an excellent sense of smell.
As he drew level with the farm, he could see a bunch of chickens clucking around and a few eggs on the floor. The farmer was poking some hay with his pitchfork and his wife was busy in the kitchen. Henner sneaked forward and grabbed the eggs, ignoring the chickens pecking at his disgusting legs. He put them in his pocket and hurried away, going towards a field of grain.
He didn't want the gate to creak so he climbed over it instead, plucking several pieces of wheat from the earth and heading to the grain mill over the wall. He climbed the multiple ladders and operated the machinery, going down to collect his flour when he realised that HE HAD NO POT! Using his head, he snorted all of the white powder and kept it in his nostrils for the journey home.
When he left the mill, he noticed the farmer walking around the way he came, so he went back the other way. As he had almost made a full circle, he saw a field with a flock of sheep in it. He spotted two pairs of black legs and yellow feet underneath one, so he walked over to it and picked up a pair of shears he had recently found. He leapt forward and within seconds, two penguins were standing there.
"Who are you?" he demanded, prodding one of the penguins.
The slightly thinner one stepped forward and said, "My name is Mr. Penguin!" before running off towards the River Lum faster than his partner. Henner quickly grabbed a shiny zip on the silent penguin and watched as the penguin suit fell off, revealing a startled male with pink knickers and a shirt saying 'Hoof Noob 4 Lyfe!' on it.
As Henner returned to his tribe, he dropped the eggs to the floor, exclaiming, "Look what I found!" He said to his chief, before sneezing the flour all over him and his wife.
"HENNER!" shouted Chief Hiker, "YOU'RE IN TROUBLE!"
Henner ran away... and became the annoying goblin that hangs around between Varrock and the Barbarian Village.

"And of course, tha' Goblin ain't me," Henner said shiftily, looking around at The White Knight and The Champion, "Anyway, I did the firs' story, it is someone else's go!"
Dr Henry picked up a handful of sticks and broke them all into the same length except for one short one. He offered one to each of them in turn until the old man picked the short straw, "And we have our next story-teller!" He announced, slapping The Ancient on his back.
"Well...here we go..." He said...

The Ancient's Tale
It was a hot day, as usual, but unusually, there was no wind. Most of the people living in the Village were used to waking up to the cool breeze of the wind skimming across the sand, moving small particles around.
"Where is the wind!" demanded the Chief, holding the Priest, Elbis, by his collar.
"My lord, I fear a great evil has awoken in the pyramid, perhaps from a thief stealing a great treasure from within. If that is so, we need the treasure back or we will be doomed with unbearable heat! The water in our mouths will evaporate until we our nothing but a shadow of our former selves!" the priest whimpered.
"Is there nothing we can do to help find the treasure?" asked an old man, dressed in red and black robes and leaning on a purple staff, who had just appeared.
"We need... we need... an ancient mage!" Elbis said dramatically.
The old man laughed, "Is that all?" he asked, raising his staff and muttering something which caused the Priest's feet to become encased within a block of ice. "You have one here!"
The Chief clicked his fingers and a crafter came running out with a chisel, chipping at the ice. "Is that so? And who may you be stranger?" he questioned.
"I have many names, but you may call me GCSE," came the reply from the dried lips of the man...
"Well, GCSE,"panted the Priest as he struggled to free his legs. "All you have to do is find the thief, freeze him, and take the treasure back!"
Suddenly, the Ancient Mage disappeared into blocks of a purple colour and vanished from sight...
Meanwhile...
In the Canifis Bar, a Cat-Burglar was having a drink with his companion, Serpentis, who was hissing at the bartender for another drink. All of a sudden, everyone in the bar froze except for Il Gato, the Cat-Burgular. GCSE stormed into the bar and shrouded himself in smoke and shadows.
"YOU!" he bellowed, "HAVE TAKEN SOMETHING THAT DOES NOT BELONG TO YOU!" GCSE picked up Il Gato by the scruff of the collar and shook him, causing a valuable statue to fall to the ground.
Without any notice, Hoof NoobQuest burst into the bar and glomped GCSE, breaking his fragile bones and killing him in an instant...

The Ancient stared at The Level 3 Noob, "Don't interrupt my story and add in complete rubbish!" He shouted before turning to Dr Henry, "I'm not going to finish it now!" He said, sulking.

By: Dr Henry
Proofread: TheAmericanIdiot
Coded: Gamestar