[P] LOVE LETTER

Wolfwood · **Posted:** October 7th, 2007, 1:15 pm

My beloved
I can not help but gaze unto the wonderment of your eyes, like looking into beauty itself.

Thy eyes are like a light piercing into my never-ending void of a soul, a shining glow of happiness and amazement.

When I look unto thee, I feel like I am immersed into an oblivion that is not of death, but of rebirth.

If I were to feel the touch of thy hand then I would know not what to do, however stay silent and bask in the warmth of thy stroke of life, love and delightment.

Thy spell is like an enchantment that I cannot break free from; as if you were to make a snap with thy delicate and lovingly sweet fingers then I still would not be denied of thy pure and breathtaking beauty.

And for this I cannot reject the brilliance of thy affectionate splendor.

Soren the Thief · **Posted:** October 9th, 2007, 4:32 pm

Ah, the romantic poem. Ever a favorite for anybody that enjoys literature. And. . .isn't experiencing a break up or something of the sort. O.o; Also, I'm no poetic expert. But this is why I'm not the only one browsing the Lit. Soc., eh?

First order of business here. *organizes stacks of papers* I noticed that this was, sadly, far too short for me to be truly entranced with the poem. I could almost feel the potentiality radiating from the thing, and I think you could have done much better on this one. There was one line that I particularly liked, though.

Quote:

When I look unto thee, I feel like I am sucked into an oblivion that is not of death, but of rebirth.

There was only one small thing that I would have to pay attention to here. The word 'sucked' I would find a synonym for, if possible. To me it brings down the quality of the line when a common word like that is used in this situation. Still a good line, of course.

That's about all I have for this one. I hope that my comments have helped, eh? *poofs away*

Wolfwood · **Posted:** October 9th, 2007, 5:05 pm

Soren the Thief wrote:

Ah, the romantic poem. Ever a favorite for anybody that enjoys literature. And. . .isn't experiencing a break up or something of the sort. O.o; Also, I'm no poetic expert. But this is why I'm not the only one browsing the Lit. Soc., eh?

First order of business here. *organizes stacks of papers* I noticed that this was, sadly, far too short for me to be truly entranced with the poem. I could almost feel the potentiality radiating from the thing, and I think you could have done much better on this one. There was one line that I particularly liked, though.

Quote:

When I look unto thee, I feel like I am sucked into an oblivion that is not of death, but of rebirth.

There was only one small thing that I would have to pay attention to here. The word 'sucked' I would find a synonym for, if possible. To me it brings down the quality of the line when a common word like that is used in this situation. Still a good line, of course.

That's about all I have for this one. I hope that my comments have helped, eh? *poofs away*

thanks soran for that insight... no really that really helped =D>

i also thought about that word 'sucked' for a while and just forgot about it

oh well not all people are as perfect and extravagant as some :oops:

[P] LOVE LETTER

Who is online